Fma a series of humorous events
by solarknight123
Summary: Just like the title says, its a series of random humorous events. This is my first fma story so hope you enjoy.
1. Winry's temper

**Full metal alchemist- a series of humorous events **

**Disclaimer-I do not own the characters from fma. **

**Authors notes Ok not only is this my first fma story but this is my first story at humor. So hope you enjoy. **

Chapter one-Winry's temper 

It was a beautiful day in Rush Valley, and Winry was working on some parts near the shop when she me Al and Ed. "Hey guys what brings you here." She asked. "Oh not much, just wanted to ask you for a little tune-up with the auto-mail. Ed. Winry sign and said "Alright but I'll cost ya."

So she was working on Ed's auto-mail for an hour and after that they all went outside to chat when some of Winry's other friends came to chat. "Hey Winry, look at the new model I made. Pretty cool huh?" one of the said. "Yeah It is." Winry answered. "So made anything new?" another one of her friends asked. "Well not to brag but.."

Winry looked at Ed and said "Oh Ed, I know a way you can repay me." "There is no way I'm going to model for you!" Ed said.

"So we'll have to do it the hard way." Winry said looking at his with strict eyes. She looked around for ideas when she saw a man holding a whip. "Excuse me sir, can I borrow your whip?" Winry asked. She was allowed and ran off towards her friends.

"Oh Ed." When he turned around, before he could reply he saw a whip coming towards him and off came his jacket. "What the!" Ed replied. WHIP, WHIP ,WHIP, WHIP, WHIP, WHIP. Sounds of the wipe could be heard and off went Ed's gloves, shirt, boots, and shoes until he was left with nothing more than his boxers.

"Now if you don't want me to whip your boxers off than I suggest you stand on that box right there." Winry demanded.

So Ed stood on the box and Winry showed all the details of her latest modifications. The guys around were interested while the girls were shouting. TAKE IT OFF, TAKE IT OFF, TAKE IT ALL OFF ,which embarrassed Ed. After everyone left and Winry was complemented on the new modifications Ed asked "Hey, I'm glad you were complemented but, "CAN I PUT ON MY FREAKEN CLOTHES NOW!"

"OH I forgot about that" Winry said.

So she took the whip, wrapped it around Ed's led, threw him spinning in the air, and whipped all of his clothes back before he hit the ground.

"Where did you learn to do that?" Al asked. "Oh I've had practice in the bed." Winry said as she remembered the time she was lying in bed and took a rope to get her book.

Al looked at Ed funny since he though it a different way. "Don't look at me." Ed said.

Just then a military officer came warning people to say indoors. And he told Ed it was scar looking for him. "Not scar again." Al said. 'Damn, doesn't he have a life?" Ed said. "Well anyway Winry it's dangerous so you better say here." Ed said. "Fine." Winry said

So Al and Ed ran off and Winry waited until they were far off. Then She took her toolbox to not only fix Ed's auto-mail, but to use as weapons.

In an ally Ed's auto-mail was broken off and he was knocked down. Just then Winry came and say the whole thing. She shouted "What the hell is going on!" Al said "Winry, it's too dangerous here.." but before he could finish Ed had an idea and stopped him. "Hey Winry, this is the guy whose always breaking my auto-mail." Ed said. Winry went right up to scar's face and asked.

"Is this true?"

"I guess." Scar said. That proved to be a fatal mistake. Winry turned around, took a step forward and then whacked him with her wrench. "What the!" scar said but before he could say anymore Winry knocked him again "What cha gonna do huh, huh?" "So you're the asshole whose been damaging his auto-mail. I'm a teach you lesion you'll never forget." While Winry continued to beat the shit out of scar, Ed was on the floor laughing while Al was shaking. Poor scar was trying to use his right hand.

"Oh you raising you hand at me, huh huh?" "Boy put your hand down!" Winry said as she smacked his hand with her wrench.

"Go ahead, raise you hand at me again, go on I dare ya, come on." Winry threaten him. Then she smacked him some more.

Don't (bop) ever (bop) mess (bop) with (bop) them (bop) or (bop) me (Bop) again, cause (bop) if (bop) you (Bop) do, I will (bop) kill (bop) your ass got that."

Scar got up and said "You are one crazy ass bitch." Then he ran screaming like a little girl. "Go on, get!" Winry shouted. She went to Ed and asked "You ok?"

"Yeah I'm ok just…" before Ed could finish Winry smacked him across the head. "Oh what the hell was that for!" Ed asked.

"That's because you let your auto-mail get destroyed again!" "Now it'll cost you extra!" Winry said. So the got up and Ed mumbled "Stupid bitch!" Just then Winry turned around and hurled her wrench. "I heard that!"

**The End **

**So I hopped you liked it. Please read and review.**


	2. Riza property

**Disclaimer- I don't own fma. **

**Author's notes-I'm glad I got some reviews and it would be nice to get more. **

Fma chapter 2-Riza's property.

It was a nice day outside and Colonel Roy Mustang and First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye were on their way to H.Q. in central. The two have been a couple for two months and have been going out. They always say things like I love love you too, can't live without you, and all the other mushy thing couples say to each other.

They reached the office where the others were, giggling and kissing.

"Wow, can you believe they've been going out for months?" Fuery said. "Well I always expected them to hook up sooner or later." Hughes said. "Maybe they'll get married soon." Farman said. "Yeah, yeah, who gives." Havoc said annoyed. "Poor guy, he's the only hopeless guy at getting a girl." Breda wishpered as they all huddled together. "I heard that!" Havoc said irritated.

"Hey Riza, has anyone told you you've got they eyes of sparkling, priceless dimonds, and the looks of a goddess?" Roy said acting swave. "Oh Roy, stop you're making me blush." Riza said closing her eyes. Whey she opened them the next thing she saw was Roy flirting with another girl who just walked in.

"Oh hell no!" Riza said. "Big mistake." The others said. Normally any other girl would just dump his ass right there, but Riza had a better idea. She took out two guns and fired all the bullets she had in them at Roy and the other girl. When the smoke cleared, it showed Roy trembling with his hands in the air and all the bullet marks on the wall right next to him(that's right just like she did with black hayate), and the other girl escaped.

"You see you're my boyfriend which means that (pointing to Roy's…. well you know.) along with the rest of you is my property and belongs to me. Got it?" Riza said. "Ye.ye.. yes ma'm ." Roy said trembling. "Good, we'll discuss this when we get home." Riza said. Roy gulped as he followed her.

"Poor Roy, he's Riza's bitch." Fuery said. "Well I hate to see what she does to him if he tries to break up with her." Farman said. Then all of a sudden Havoc broke down crying and said, "Well at least he has a girl to make a bitch out of him." "pathetic.", the others said. **The End **

**Well hoped you liked it. Please read and review.**

**P.S. Riza was pointing to Roy's privet part in case you didn't know what I ment.**


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